I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
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