What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
