I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Randomize
