went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
