Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize