were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
Randomize
