I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
I touched a dick in church today
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
