Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Randomize
