We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Randomize
