Nicole vs. Life
wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
