these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Randomize
