i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize