He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
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