No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
i just woke up to that girl in my doorway. I kid you not. Tan and lime green thong on. peeing on the carpet in the hallway. Then she collapsed. There is a load of towels in the wash. Just thought you should know when you wake up. Gross.
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize