You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Randomize