Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
