good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
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