...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
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