why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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