I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
Randomize
