before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize
