every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
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