I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
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