Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Randomize
