Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
Randomize
