She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize