He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
