Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
Randomize
