Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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