Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
