What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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