i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
Randomize
