You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
she smelled like a LAN party
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Randomize
