no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Randomize
