So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Randomize
