I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Thank you for not boning my boss.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Randomize
