I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Randomize