the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize
