There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Randomize
