think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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