After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
