My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
I just added a bunch of arbitrary options to my ouija board. Ghosts can now tell me "cheddar," "the homosexual agenda," "the whole foods vegan aisle," or "viable offspring"
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
