their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
