My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
He has the fingertips of a God
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
