So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
it was like eating out sand paper
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
