You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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