I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
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