just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Randomize
