her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Randomize
