I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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