everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Randomize
